Tag Archives: love

Art Of Flirting Or Is It Pointers On Connecting?

This is something I chanced upon a short while back which I shared with my Twitter friends. I know some of them bookmarked it for future reference. 🙂

Meeting people and going out on several dates over the past few years I’ve realised that finding a connection is sometimes hard. Both parties worry about awkward moments and we fret too much at times over what the other thinks so much so that we run headlong into tongue-tied moments. Then there are moments that follow a wonderful & lively exchange where we find ourselves a little lost and wondering what to talk about next.

Not everyone has the gift of the gab and hitting things off constantly with sparks of chemistry flying doesn’t always happen like in the movies or fairy-tale romantic situations.

This article from Third Age entitle “The Art Of Flirting” is quite a fun read and some of the pointers are great ideas to help with those first few dates and conversations.

We are all familiar with the first few pointers like using flattery and making immediate, direct eye contact but here are a few of my favourites:
– Repeat the Person’s Name
– Ask “No One Ever Asked Me That Before” Questions
– To Get Subtle Attention — Whisper

There’s even a pretty good guide on how to do a proper “double take”!

Add all these to your bag of tricks along with your thoughts on things you’re passionate about and you’re likely set for a great time.

One piece of advice I’d offer is to try and notice how much of an exchange there is early on. By exchange I mean does he/she ask you the same questions to find out just as much about you, does he/she initiate reaching out to you by texting, calling, MSNing or saying things to you that make you smile.

Sometimes it takes a few dates for the other person to reciprocate and participate in this exchange because they need time to warm up but this should happen. If you don’t notice it happening, then it’s a good idea to follow the Third Age article’s Pointer #17 : Use the Old 1-2-3 Routine.

This is jumping ahead a bit but I these thoughts are in our head when we date anyway so I thought i’d finish this post with two lessons I’ve been taught by watching two long-term couples (12 yrs & 16 yrs) who are dear friends of mine:

Bringing Out The Best In Each Other: you both should amplify each other’s positives. With him/her, you find depths of patience, character, understanding and strength that you didn’t realise you had.

Saving Each Other From Ourselves: you both see each other’s short-comings, mistakes, stubbornness and flaws and are able to help each other curb them a little, stay clear of them or learn from these mistakes made.

Have a great day everyone and happy dating, falling & staying in love.

Moving On & Letting Go

Was randomly surfing the web and I came across the following idea.

When we walk away from something, we need to do it with love & acceptance. When done with frustration and hate this tends to make the experience repeat itself until we’ve truly learnt from it.

It actually does makes a lot of sense.

Thought I’d share this as I know many of us cling on to so many things in our lives. Being able to love, accept and move on will bring greater and more beautiful experiences into our lives.


Law of Love – Love is the building block of all things. Love is energy. Love is not just some mushy feeling. It is energy, the actual building material of all things. It is an actual substance; in fact it is the only substance that exists, taking on the appearance of many forms. Love is also acceptance. It is acknowledging that All Things Are One. That is acceptance. The law of love ensures that you see this truth. You cannot leave an experience permanently unless you exit with love and acceptance. That is why people tend to keep repeating the same types of experiences until the day they stop hating and fighting it and instead embrace it with love and see what the situation holds for them, and heal it with love. This could be a money, health or relationship issue. It doesn’t matter. You cannot leave asituation permanently until you exit it with love. You can’t permanently get rid of what you hate; you can only leave it or transform it through love. This law ensures that you recognize the truth of unity and drop the illusions of separation.

Read more about the Universal Laws here.

Pink Dot

It was an amazing Saturday. I even got my picture in the newspaper. Look mom … that’s me!

An anonymous visitor to my blog posted “Poster Boy for Pink Dot?” to one of my entries. I’m tickled pink by that.

We’ve come a long way since the mid-90s when I set up Out Loud & Proud, a website about my coming-out. The intent was to give hope to asian people who were gay and in the closet. To let them know that it is OK to love another guy openly. To show your love for the world to see.

I would have never imagined in my 20s that I’d be participating in something so significant in 2009.

Just wanted to share these moving words:

“i just hope for greater awareness and less prejudice … and everybody getting along and letting people love whoever they want to love” Selena Tan

“i hope that we become more open as a society and respect each other’s needs to love and so we can all just live togehter in harmony” Pam Oei

“we are born alone, we go to our graves alone, but there is no reason why any of us should have to live alone in this life without love purely because of intolerance and judgement” Neo Swee Lin

And as Swee Lin quoted “Be the change that you want to see in the world.” Mohandas Gandhi

See the pinkdot video taken on that day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9gDazG4cC0

The video encouraging people to come make pinkdot: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDdoT7opmrg

Come Support Pink Dot on Sat, 16 May @ Hong Lim Park

The Freedom To Love

I really love this … its a beautiful and moving video.

Together we shall celebrate diversity and equality and create a symbol for Singapore’s more inclusive future.

Come & make pink-dot with all those who’re going down to Hong Lim Park on Saturday, 16 May 2009, 4.30pm!

Official Site: Official site: http://pinkdot.sg

Blog: http://pinkdotsg.blogspot.com/

Support The Freedom To Love

There’s an amazing event being organised at Hong Lim Park in Singapore in support of the freedom to love.

On 16 May, Saturday at 4.30pm, pinkdot organisers are hoping people will come dressed in pink for an aerial photograph to be taken.

If you support the freedom of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people to love, then I hope you’ll participate and dress in pink and join in this “smart mob”.

According to pinkdot:
This is not a protest nor a parade, just a simple call for open-minded Singaporeans to come together to form a pink dot.

This pink dot is a celebration of diveristy and equality and as sumbol of Singapore’s more inclusive future.

This is 100% legal.

I’m asking all my blogger frens …. please help spread the word for this

This is a show of support for the freedom to love.