my fren has a problem most gay guys suffer from. this suffering continues till we get jaded about love and started to chant “there’s no such thing as love” each time we meet someone (chanted more intensely if it seems remotely possible to fall for this someone). we end up chanting it so regularly through the years that eventually it hardens our hearts so we don’t get hurt. this marks a milestone in our development coz we can now fuck with wild abandonment and live life to the fullest. this is the enlightened state many wish to attain as they so hope to end up being in a loving relationship at the same time being able to watch their lover give a stranger head as they indulge in their weekly threesomes
so i do my duty to try and push him over the threshold … to open his eyes to the truth that all men are bastards … to start him on the road to the lifting of this burden we call the heart. hey …. if u can’t beat them …join them i say
why do i counsel him this way?
I seriously don’t believe that guys can really love. so many of us are ruled by our dicks that we don’t know the meaning of love. even after we “fall-in-love” … we stay focused for the duration the infactuation lasts and then we start getting itchy for a new piece of meat to be placed in our mouths. before we cum with this new guy … we’re already bored wondering wat sex wud be like if we had gone home with another guy instead.
when we get tired of carnal pleasure … we move on to the mind-fuck
when we’ve had enough of the physical and mental hunt …. we meet someone who seems to get our juices flowing …. get lazy and contented and “settle down”.
slowly we end up taking the relationship for granted …. regressing into a routine…. regressing into silence as maintaining a relationship takes time and effort and sometimes that’s just too much
men are terrible at relationships. don’t u think they are the laziest asses in the world. they don’t get half the signals their partners send them so communication isn’t obviously one of their strong traits so why this need to find someone to be with if u aren’t going to spend that much time sharing things
have u ever noticed that its usually the wife that maintains the social bonds outside a family unit while the husband is content to stay at home and become a hermit …. indulging in his own routines and cozying up in his own private “kingdom”. I look at my parents, my parents frens, my frens parents and realise that if it wasn’t for the females in these families … the men would be happy to let social bonds fade away to be renewed only infrequently
guys ….. don’t we all make the effort to love initially … but deep down inside … aren’t we just lazy assed bums who like our own space a little too much?
so with so many things working against us … why would any sane man want to fall in love with another man …. and yearn for it so much that it breaks him down to tears?
oh dear. i hope i dont get to that point then!!!
love that feeling of bliss.. sigh.
errr … feeling utterly in love and that u’ve found your soul mate, the warm fuzzy feeling u get when u see him, fall asleep with him, wake up next to him, hanging onto his every every word and him wanting to know every detail of ur day. feeling that you’ve found someone u can share ur life with and whom u can talk into the early hours of the morning with
watever it is; i second u, jerm. all men sucks big time in relationship. the biggest wanker too! period!
being in love is often a physiological response… love is something that is stronger but may be less fireworks than people like to make it out to be,
define bliss…
meaning of love or what it means to be in love?
but would this be prizing committment or actually just playing around with the idea of love?
i dun think many people understands the meaning of love.
maybe its becaue we “prized” commitment and relationships and worship them as a divine state of being without realising we’re not really equipped to handle it or worse … when we are in it .. throw it away coz we’re just after something shiny and pretty
i think we can trascend self-interests la …. that fuels a large part of relationships and i have seen many self-interested jerks who are plastic beyond believe … but i’ve also met some truely wonderful frens who care for u just becoz.
reward of loving someone …. i think there’s also a time-period to this la … i’ve been in 2 three yr relationships, 1 five year relationship, several 1 yr plus relationships and i think the feeling of bliss wears off
yeah i agree on men being bad at social bonds..
however.. i think gay people are bad in relationships because we do not value the notion of committment and relationship.. instead going with how we feel at the present.. this is basically because we often have nothing to work towards. it sucks though
on one hand i have to agree with you the “spread your seed ruled by our dicks” innate behaviour is very real.. base instinct indeed. but that said, when you meet someone you fall in love with insanely, and yearn for it as badly as you described it, i think those deeper feelings of love supersede that innate behaviour. sometimes there’s a struggle between the two, but i think the reward/payoff for loving someone is on a completely different one from the feeling one gets from his next conquest. heh.
re: men are terrible at relationships and would happily let social bonds fade away, i think this applies to almost everyone, but based on the notion of self interest. i once read a poet say there’s no such thing as friendship or relationship in this world – only pple guided by their self-interest.
we can’t help desiring for a “happy ending”, so conditioned by fairytales & movies we are.